A little over a year ago a very nice woman named Debra found my blog and asked if I wanted to write a book about yoga. Seriously? Yes! I always wanted to write a book!
How hard can it be?
Tori Spelling wrote a book.
Two of those Girls Next Door wrote books. You know, the it’s-not-weird-at-all-that-we’re-in-our-20’s-banging-dating-Hugh-Hefner-who-is-150 girls. Maybe the third one did, I have no idea.
Bobbie Brown wrote a book. If you don’t know who Bobbie Brown is, all I have to say is “Cherry Pie.” No? “Warrant.” NO? Come on!
Here is the info Amazon gives you about Bobbie Brown’s book, “Dirty Rocker Boys:” An uncensored Hollywood tell-all filled with explicit tales of love, sex, and revenge from the video vixen made famous by Warrant’s rock anthem “Cherry Pie.” I clicked “look inside” but for some reason it’s not working and now I have to buy it.
So I just did.
The first line: Wait what happened? Last week Tommy Lee was my fiance. This week, he’s married. To Pamela Anderson.
This is gonna be good.
Maybe I should change up the first line of “Bent.” Give it some juice. I was never engaged to Tommy Lee, but certainly no one will notice if I do a little fudging of the facts. There’s a lot of cool people who are dead. I could use one of their names, or really anyone’s who has a mugshot. It’ll be my word against theirs, which won’t amount to a hill of beans.
Maybe I… slept with Axl Rose. Yeah. I totally slept with Axl Rose you guys. In fact we were engaged and then he left me for Stephanie Seymour after they made the November Rain video.
And you thought “Bent” was going to be a boring yoga book!